I Just Had S
by Muggleborn Malfoy
Summary: So basically Ron and Harry turn into George's lab rats for a new Joke for WWW. The title explains why it is rated M. I do not own Harry Potter that is J.K. Rowling the genious.


Harry POV

As the Weasleys, Hermione, and I sat down in the larger living room of the burrow, I started to get the feeling that tonight was going to go very wrong. Ginny was sitting on the couch with her parents looking very guilty. Why shouldn't she though, I mean we just did something that would definitely get me killed by all of her brothers besides Ron. Mrs. Weasley summoned the tea and then I allowed George to pour my glass. That feeling of something wrong kept growing, but I push it off. _Probably still protectiveness from the war, _I thought as I took a big gulp of my tea as Ron and the girls did the same.

"So George how is Weasley's Wizard Wheezes going?" Asks Mr. Weasley after a long silence.

"It's going great. We have a new product that I will show you soon." George answered with a mischievous grin spreading across his face. "So Harry, Ginny what were you doing this afternoon? You too Ron, Hermione." He said with that grin still plastered on his face.

Suddenly music began coming from mine and Ron's bodies. I started to feel really weird, and then me and Ron started singing and dancing around the room. 

[Harry]  
>Sometimes<br>Something beautiful happens  
>in this world<p>

[Ron]  
>Oh<br>Ronald  
>And Harry Potter<p>

[Harry]  
>You don't know how to express yourself so<br>You just gotta sing

[Both]  
>I just had sex<br>And it felt so good (felt so good)  
>A woman let me put my penis inside her (her)<br>I just had sex (Hey!)  
>And I'll never go back (never go back)<br>To the not-having-sex  
>Ways of the past<p>

[Harry]

Have you ever had sex?  
>I have, it felt great<br>It felt so good when I did it with my penis

A girl let me do it  
>It literally just happened<br>Having sex could make a nice man out' the meanest

[Ron]

You'll never guess where I just came from  
>I had sex<br>If I had to describe the feeling it was the best

When I had the sex  
>'Meant my penis felt great<br>And I called my parents right after I was done

[Harry]

Oh hey, didn't see you there

_I bumped into Ron just to emphasize that I didn't see him, but I am not doing this out of free will. Trust me. _

Guess what I just did  
>Had sex, undressed, saw her boobies and the rest<p>

[Ron]

Well sure  
>Nice of her to let you do that thing<p>

[Harry]

Nice of any girl ever

[Ron]

Now sing

[Both]  
>I just had sex<br>And it felt so good (felt so good)  
>A woman let me put my penis inside her (her)<br>I Wanna tell the world

[Harry]

To be honest  
>I'm surprised she even wanted me to do it<p>

[Ron]

Doesn't really make sense

[Harry]

But man, screw it

[Ron]

I ain't one to argue with a good thing

[Harry]

She could be my wife

[Ron]

That good?

[Harry]

The best 30 seconds of my life

_What am I saying it lasted for about an hour… SNAP OUT OF IT POTTER!_

[Ron]

I'm so humbled by a girls ability to let me do her

[Harry]

Cuz honestly I'd have sex with a pile of manure  
>With that in mind the soft, nice-smellin' girl's better<p>

[Ron]

She let me wear my chain and my turtle neck sweater

[Both]

So this one's dedicated to them girls  
>That let us flop around on top of them<br>If you're near or far, whether short or tall  
>We wanna thank you all for lettin' us fuck you<p>

[Ron]

She kept looking at her watch

[Both]

Doesn't matter, I had sex

[Harry]

But I cried the whole time

[Both]

Doesn't matter, I had sex

[Ron]

I think she might have been a racist

[Both]

Doesn't matter, I had sex

[Harry]

She put a bag on my head

[Both]

Still counts  
>I just had sex<br>And my dreams came true (dreams came true)  
>So if you had sex in the last 30 minutes then you're qualified to sing with me<p>

_The most unexpected thing just happened, Ginny and Hermione jump up and begin to sing with me and Ron. _

[Hermione, Ginny, Harry, and Ron]

I just had sex (everybody sing!)  
>And it felt so good (we all had sex!)<br>A woman let me put my penis inside her (I wanna tell the whole world!)  
>I just had sex (I just had sex!)<br>And I'll never go back (no, no, no!)  
>To the not-having-sex<br>Ways of the past

What the bloody hell did I just do and why did I do it? I mean all I did was drink some tea than George asked what me, Ron, Hermione, Ginny were doing… THE TEA HAD A POTION!

"Ladies and gentlemen, let me introduce you into the song potion. A new Wheeze in the shop, when someone drinks it the potion searches their memory for something relating to the question asked then the potion selects a song that relates to that thought." George explained after he calmed down from his laughing fit.

"So does that mean…?" Mrs. Weasley started looking very pale indeed.

"Harry, Ginny, Ron, and Hermione have just recently lost their virginity." George _un_helpfully finished.

The only thought I can come up with right now is, _I'm screwed._


End file.
